Saturday, August 9, 2008

First Day At Work

So I really need to start taking daily pictures again. My blogs just seem so bland and unenjoyable without some color to liven them up. Anyway, I started work today.

I wasn't supposed to start until the 19th, but I was called in on short notice to come in for my first shift. It was good stuff. It's Limited Too. I folded clothes. Smiled at customers. Folded and put away more clothes. Repeat. Co-workers seem nice, boss seems nice, everything seems...nice. Before I went in today I prayed "Jesus, let your light shine through me at this place, and I pray they'll know you through the way I carry myself here." I intend on continuing that prayer every time I step in those doors. The workplace, though you have to be careful (not that anything will stop me from sharing Christ), is an amazing witnessing and ministering opportunity. You don't even have to speak words of Christ to simply let Him shine through your daily attitudes. I will be tested in the faith more at this job (and my upcoming one in September) than doing anything else because I know that how I respond to situations, present myself, interact with co-workers, and the attitudes I bring will either make or break my witness. I intend on doing everything possible to show everybody around me there that Christ is in me, and I am not of myself.

I only pray this plays out as wonderfully and easily as it sounds.

God, help.

I want people to know Him like I know Him. I want to see people saved. tonight, on the way home, I started thinking about hell. A lot of times, when I think of hell, I imagine some bad place I know I'll never have to worry about. So it really doesn't effect or phase me. That is, until I begin thinking about the very people I love and am close to being there. When I think about their separation from Christ. When I think about what I could be doing to prevent that. It gives hell a completely different reality that my mind normally doesn't comprehend. I was suddenly broken, saddened that people I see walking down the street every day, that I simply pass by while entertaining my mind with thoughts of myself, could die and face an eternity without Father. That they could suffer in hell. And I did absolutely nothing to prevent that. I think since this whole Calvinism thing, I've developed a deeper passion to see people saved. I've developed a bigger heart for the lost. No, I'm not great. God put it in me. If it weren't for Him drawing me towards this newly deepened desire, I wouldn't care anything about lost people - because in my flesh, I'm self-absorbed and vain.

I imagined myself running to people on the streets, falling to the ground at their feet, and pleading with them in tears to come to Christ and take what He has to offer. I saw myself giving away my own money to anyone willing to stand and listen to the entire Gospel. Bribery - not the best form of witnessing. I wouldn't recommend it. But that's not the point. The point is I got to a center-focus in my head where I would do anything, say anything, give up anything just to make sure that the people I normally pass by every day would at least hear the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Ezekiel 3:18
"When I say to the wicked, 'You will surely die,' and you do not warn him or speak out to warn the wicked from his wicked way that he may live, that wicked man shall die in his iniquity, but his blood I will require at your hand."

I don't want this to happen to me. I don't want God to look at me in disappointment because I did not reach out to a lost person that didn't know Him. I don't want to know that because I did not speak up, because I was too wrapped up in myself, because I was too ashamed or embarrassed; someone died and spent an eternity without Father in the most awful place imaginable. I never want to be the one that didn't share the Gospel when God gave her the opportunity to.

I'm rambling at this point. But it's so vital. It's so important. People need Jesus. People need to know His name. They need to know His love. And with Him so willingly offering it to anyone that believes, I'm so sickened that anyone would turn it down.

God I pray that I can change things through you. I pray that I can bring you most glory when I'm walking streets or shopping in stores or writing on the Internet because through me you speak so loud and so clear that souls are won to you, and more are brought into your incredible Kingdom. Put in me a fire, a passion to see people get redeemed and bought by your blood. Put in me the heart of you, Father. The heart that wills that none perish, but that all come to repentance and receive grace. Give me your heart. Give me your eyes. Open doors and - don't ask - but forcefully command and compel me to take those opportunities you give to spread your truth and never turn them down. Take away selfishness. Take away vanity and pride. Take away anything and everything that would hinder me from evangelizing. And I pray that EVERY, I mean EVERY person I tell about you will be broken and compelled to repent and trust in your name.


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